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n. An [alternative] to the crass commercialization of Christmas, typically celebrated on December 23. It involves The Airing of Grievances (telling your family and friends all the ways they have disappointed you during the year) and does not end until the Feats of Strength (pinning the head of the family) are [accomplished]. A plain, metal pole is used in lieu of a [Christmas tree], because decorations (such as tinsel) is distracting from the true meaning of the holiday.
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