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A bizarre cult centered around the movement of boats across water in [straight lines], propelled by the mental force of anywhere from one to eight human, virgin adherents. During the winter months, its disciples rise well earlier than most sane humans for their bizzare sunrise rituals, including self-injury caused by the use of a holy relic known only as an "erg," which strangely resembles a Medieval [torture rack], in honour of their victory-god, "Henley", and 18 mile pilgrimage runs to honour the river-god "Nationals", and his mate "Canadian Nationals". [The sacred] hymns of the Scottish musical duo "The Proclaimers" are played during these rituals.
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