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An overweight figure, most commonly found lurking about goth clubs [after the] [successful] plunder of a local Honeybaked location. By the trail of [honey glaze], the Hampire is armed with a bodily odor so foul, that it asphyxiates those caught in the wake of its' greasy treacle. Should you encounter a Hampire, it is said that the best defense against the foul pantry-dweller, is a good pair of cross-training shoes: If it can't keep up with you, the Hampire will soon loose all interest in you, favoring the closest emochilde it can snack upon.
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