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M: An Irish boy who only wishes to be as badass as his dad. He loves girls, but they don't [love him] back :( Thinks [everyone] comes to him, when really, they runaway. pooooorrr riiiveeeeeerrrr. J: A redheaded monster that has decent abs for his age, but all turns bad when his face is exposed. He is a put a bag over and tap. Calls you, and hangs up. Even though he's kinda mean [sometimes], he claims he loves you, and weirdly, you find yourself growing feelings for him, too. Also, he likes to send pictures. And he refuses to measure his sausage because he claims to not be able to find a ruler.
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