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1. The living machine behind the madness that is guitar in the [progressive metal] band known as [Dream Theater]. Anyone relevant to this man, whether they have seen him perform or know him personally, is probably either dead or severely to mortally wounded from the sonic warfare he omits when in "[world domination mode]". Petrucci's balls are assumed to be so large that they exert their own gravitational force roughly equivalent to that of Saturn.
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