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New Moon is the second novel in the Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer. It is another desperate rant about how Bella's life has gone awry yet again (oh noes =O) because Edward, being a pussy and unable to handle their [relationship] "difficulties", ditched her and promised to never come back. (Good riddance.)

Bella turns into a zombie because she is completely oblivious of the real world (since her senses filter out anything that is NOT Edward -- ie. [Zomg] I have friends at school???) and because she had a non-existent [personality] to begin with. She soon falls dependent on her werewolf rebound, Jacob, who actually thinks it's a score to hang out with Bella. (What d'ya know, another disgrace to supernatural beings.) He has no idea that Bella is just using him as a source of sanity and for opportunities of suicide (because she's so [incompetent] she lacks the know-how of self-destruction.)

Edward couldn't deal with his epic fail any better, but at least he had the willpower to rid the world of himself. Instead of moving on to, oh, let's say, a more worthy [significant other] (which should be hella easy to find, after BELLA) he decides to completely waste himself. His actions displayed a form of character UNdevelopment which was somehow interpreted as passion by some people. T_____T

The middle chapters are [predictable] as hell. Current readers: for your benefit, just guess what happens and skip to the end. Or better yet, ditch the book and read the plot synopsis on Wikipedia to discover that you have saved a great deal of time and brain cells. Really.

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