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A penis that lives and rules over a castle and a kingdom, whose main goal is to slay the vaginas in caves that [terrorize] the citizens of his kingdom. The first such penis appeared in Britain in 1543, when the great King Asshole left his kingdom in [the hands] of his grandson, the Penis, instead of his son, the Taint. The penis then successfully fought off the [French army], thus creating the legend that we revere to this day.
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