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(n), (v) The most tender of all sexual acts, consisting of the following elements: (1) Female eats chili, cheddar [cheese], diced white [onion]; (2) Female defecates in underpants; (3) Stool, with bumpy consistency is spread gently and evenly throughout length of Female asscrack, preferably by way of pastel colored rubber spatula, so as to resemble a [loose]-burger coney dog. (4) Male makes passionate love to the "loose burger." (5) Upon ejaculation, female cleans up.
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