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The purest compound of noob, or more definitively, the simplest form of noob. The noob molecule consists of carbon, hydrogen, oxygen, and titanium. It is very unstable, can be found in all three states of matter (solid, liquid, and gas) on earth, and is usually saturated. To be less specific in chemical makeup, noobsauce consists of two major [ingredients]: noob and sauce. The noob is a lonely creature that roams [the internet] searching for an answer but often only finds people against him in his journey to find the truth. Many noobs grow out of their state to become noobhaters themselves, but the process of maturity is long and arduous. Sauce is a key ingredient in almost every living substance. Some believe that the term sauce is too unspecific, and that there are many different types of sauce. While this is true, sauce in its most basic form is no type of sauce at all. In fact, tomato sauce, like noobsauce, is made of two very different bases: tomato and sauce. Sauce can be combined with almost anything, and, for the purpose of this definition, sauce bonds with the purest essence of noob to create the compound that we today know as noobsauce. The origin of noobsauce is unknown, but most likely was a joint creation between the vast amount of users of the [world wide web]. According to currently accepted theories, these intelligent pioneers of science experimented with the noob compound and accidently came across this substance. They found its [characteristics] remarkably [interesting] and continued to experiment. Today, thanks to these brilliant engineers, many variations of noobsauce can be found across the world. Noobsauce varies based upon the [geographical] locations where it is found. American noobsauce has a rather derogatory meaning, whereas the Chinese version of noobsauce can be used to sell [online gaming] items over internet trading posts such as eBay. These Chinese noobs have become some of the wealthiest people of their country. The antithesis of noobsauce is [awesomesauce], which of course consists of awesome and sauce. The awesome compound is very similar to that of the noob. Like the noob compound, it consists of carbon, hydrogen, and oxygen, but titanium is replaced by argon. Combining noobsauce and [awesomesauce] results in a similar situation as combining a base and an acid: they are each [neutralized], the sauce assimilating into its original form, and, when awesome and noob bond, matter itself implodes only to erase this [impossible] combination of elements from existence. In conclusion, noobsauce is a very fragile substance and should not be tampered with lest it contaminate the other substances around it. Too much exposure to noobsauce can result in deforming effects to those exposed. Side effects may include whining, asking too many questions, and using numbers in the place of letters in words where they should not be used (for instance typing n00b54uc3 instead of noobsauce). (Slang) To be covered in noobsauce - V. tr. 1. The act of being infected with the noobsauce compound. 2. The illusion of being infected with the noobsauce compound.
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