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mobile icecream salesman that hibernates during winter, though has some confused awakenings off-peak. a tacky chime breaks the eery silence that seems to preceed his visit. more adults than kids run to the van seeking a 99 and a gumball, or any kind of icecream with a chocolate flake, sprinkles, and red or green syrup.

a [mysterious figure] to adult and child alike, the icecream man is never seen in bodily entirity. filthy looking hands and you note not to eat the cone, but you do because it's dripping. almost certainly has big hairy arms and an aged, smudged tatoo of a swift on the back of his hand - are they all the same guy, like [santa clause]? do they belong to a not so secret or subtle guild? are they all striving to look like throwbacks from 1983 with their [Chuckle Brothers]/pub darts player from Swindon appearance, like Uncle Rico from Napolean Dynamite?

Who knows? by the time you've considerered all these things, your icecream will have melted and he'll have recklessly reversed and sped off in his yellow disney/supermario/pokemon adorned van with 'MIND THAT CHILD' on the back.

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