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Here is the story of the Chapor:
Once upon a time in a land named Edmonton, there was a school named St. Rose. In that school there were three main characters, Fungus, Stoner, and The Beast (aka Chapor). Fungus and Stoner despised the Beast, and tried repeatedly to kill it, but to no avail. [One] day they spotted a creature similar to the Beast (Ashley West)that had taken a liking towards the Chapor, and tried to kill it as well. Alas, it was [impossible]. [The creatures] were far too fat to harm. So Fungus and Stoner hatched an ingenious plot. They would lure the Beasts out of their lair (where many lesbianic and bestial acts occurred) and into [the streets] with a freshly killed pig. That way they could chase them into the sewers and they would never be seen from again. [On the night] of the big plan, our two heroes laid the pig onto the sidewalk near the sewer vent. As soon as they had done this, the two Beasts came barreling out of the School and started feasting on the pig. Fungus, Stoner, and the rest of the St. Rose denizens came running towards the Beasts with spears and torches. The Beasts grabbed the pig and high tailed it into the sewers, and the angry denizens quickly shut the lid. To this day, many sewer cleaners and [small children] have gone missing when playing near the sewers. There have also been reports of wild animals such as rats having strange, Chapor-like litters. It is a true story, just like Santa and the tooth faery and the story of Ed, The Mighty Beanstalk, and the Big Bad Vlad.

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