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/ˈpyʊrɪti ˈɡɑ rdiən/ noun 1. A self-appointed enforcer of perceived moral or sexual purity, often found lurking in religious households, youth groups, or [conservative] communities. 2. A person (often a parent, leader, or elder sibling) who monitors the behavior, thoughts, clothing, and [friendships] of others in the name of holiness. Common behaviors: Frequently asks, “Who were you with?” and “What were you wearing?” Monitors text messages, crushes, and clothing length with the intensity of a [federal agent]. Believes human intimacy is dangerous until legally and heterosexually sanctified.
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