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my dearest * how i wish i never met you. all my life, i waited in silence for a face i could not name, and then you appeared, the angel hidden behind the veil of sleep. when i saw you, i couldn’t [believe it]. i had found you, but my heartso fragile, so trembling, could not speak the truth it had carried through lifetimes. how could i speak to you, when we were strangers and only one of us [remembered]? how foolish i would have seemed, to say my soul had met yours long before this world, to claim i knew you like the sky knows the stars. but you had [forgotten]. was it not god’s will we meet again? was this not the echo of a [vow] once sworn in light? but someone else won. many came before, and still, none held [your heart]. i waited. i watched. i believed we would end together, you for me, and i for you. then we became friends, and it was [more than] anything i’d known. no bond matched it. the world faded. only you, my divine friend. even [the angels] rejoiced at what we shared. and then, i ruined it. i made the mistake knowingly, believing i was unworthy, how could i, dust and doubt, deserve someone divine? and so it ended. i still see your face, the moment you knew. my heart never stopped breaking. your name lived in my dreams, your voice, your presence. and for a moment, god gave you back. we had our date. it was soft, perfect. a dream made real. when you left my car, i felt the ache of eternity. i miss you. and i wish i never met you – because in meeting you, i lost my faith in destiny

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