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A brutal [self-improvement] program designed to [obliterate] weakness, eradicate excuses, and forcibly reconstruct men from broken, pathetic husks into unstoppable war machines. [Originally] created by Darius Tungsten-Carbide, a man so powerful that his mere existence gave birth to Australia’s dangerous wildlife (snakes? Spiders? Drop bears? All weak creatures that tried and failed to impress him).
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