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an anal and gastrointestinal [phenomenon] characterized by an initial sudden knee-buckling writhe in one's stomach requiring immediate restroom escort, in where one's very own belligerence and will to live will endure no less than 30 minutes of exposure to a chasm of pain so entrenched from one's normal everyday awareness that when one has fought themselves loose from its anchoring [constipation], one will find their life's impurities and anxieties for failure curled and [concentrated] under them into a tame and flushable dud; queuing the impetus to a refined and cleansed existence
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