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A Jer Bear is someone whose food addiction has progressed to the magnitude of an addiction to heroin. Food is often the only thing on a Jer Bear’s mind, especially Big Macs. Because of this, they often have trouble focusing. Other foods that a Jer Bear might crave could be pizza, french fries, fried chicken, pasta, or meat of any kind. It has never been proven whether or not the appetite of a Jer Bear can be satisfied, but most experts believe that it can not. The leading Jer-Bearologists claim that “Getting a Jer Bear to stop being hungry is like trying to reach zero degrees Kelvin.” Be careful if you ever meet a Jer Bear; they cannot control their hunger. The chance that he tries to eat you is reason enough for alarm, however, it would be far more devastating if he were to sit on you.
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