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She was my best friend. She did [everything] for me. Especially make me laugh. was so stupid and made so many dumb mistakes. was lost and high [all the time]. And she started changing her mind but I was too high to even notice. Till it was to late. started going crazy because I knew. she let me suffer to keep me around as a [fall back guy]. mean I was really hurting all I wanted was to know the truth. But she liked to do things right behind my back cause it turned her on like the bbq in Oakland. feel like such a fool. gave myself to her but that was my mistake and I wish I could [take it back]. She was so soft and squishy I loved holding her it was my favorite thing in the world. I came home after [years] and we got a room we slept together and then was on separate sides o the bed and I was falling asleep not trying to hold her cause I was so mad. think I heard her crying but I was really mad at her. Now she wants me back cause she's done having fun with other men. She thinks he can just fuck everyone and when shes done just come back. I also suffered for years and went crazy and you let me kill myself. You did talk about counseling and shit but never thought this is what woulda happened. asked God for you to be married and happy and for him to show me if you were with someone and it came out your own mouth. Was so stupid and let me drown myself while you would make fun of me. But God sees [everything]. So much to say but only 1500 words are aloud if they even show this

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