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Super tall. Kind of looks like the monopoly dude. Rich [of course]. If it has a hole, chances are ole Mel's been in it. He's a gummy eating, beer drinking, soft lover ladies. Mel doesn't mess around with anything under 280lbs though so if ya aint 280 you aint a lady. You can catch Mel Mon-Fri from 6am-12pm at your local nudie bar [throwing down] some Mels. Mel calls $100 bills Mels because has rich and can. I know right, what an ass. As for [Saturday and Sunday], Mel usually takes his PJ down to Vegas to get his new Escort for the upcoming week to do it ALL OVER AGAIN.
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