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a Woofe maximus, more commonly known as just a wild Woofe. Weighing in at around 230 kilograms and standing more than half a meter tall on three legs, this creature is capable of consuming bark, defenestrating political opponents, and using worldwide governments as cover to run an [international] drug cartel. The [existence] of such a creature has puzzled [scientists] for decades. We believe the population of Woofe is currently racing to and may possibly be exceeding 65,000. At this point, this--this species is considered a threat to most native life in environments it’s introduced.
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