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Vagina Spiders are spider-like creatures that live in middle-aged women's vaginas. They are mainly caused by being lazy, arrogant, and [sleeping with] men out of their league. Vagina Spiders are extremely territorial, biting anyone that steps in their presence; or should I say "sticks" in their presence. They reproduce by laying eggs in mattresses, though they must change bedding grounds every 5 years. A [vagina spider] fears nothing, so they are dangerous to all men. If you wake up in the morning in her bed and you have bite marks; immediately go to the hospital. Also, DO NOT come into contact with other men, because you were attacked by a Vagina spider and now carry them. If the woman you were [sleeping with] has Vagina Spiders, DO NOT come in close contact with her. Not only will the spiders know you are in their presence again, but their next attack will be deadly.
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