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When a person blows their nose so hard that it sounds like

[Dizzy Gillespie] getting warmed up before his next set. Usually caused when one nasal passage is held closed with a tissue while the other is left slightly open. Sometimes sounds like a loud fart which often confuses [innocent bystanders] as they expect to smell the familiar scent of ass but are left feeling [disappointed] due to a lack of closure. Multiple blasts of the horn may be heard repeatedly, especially if one has a cold or allergies or has built up a lot of congestion. Just as a cellist utilizes their bow, a nose trumpeter uses his tissue paper to craft subtle harmonics and vibratos which perfectly accompany the sounds of nasal fluid blasting out of his nose holes at 100 miles per hour.
Every [office] job usually has at least one of these talented horn players, and late in the day when the office is quiet you can often hear their stunning performances echoing across the cube farm. Note that nose trumpeting is a finely honed skill, so when you're just starting to play you may only be able to play a single, very loud pitch. This is expected, but with consistent practice, you'll be covering your favorite jazz standards in no time.

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