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A woman—typically between the ages of 25-55—that hangs corny, generic signs throughout her house that read "GATHER" or "[BLESS THIS HOUSE]" or "LOVE NEVER FAILS" etc. These signs are procured from stores like Kirkland's, Bed Bath & Beyond, and Target. This woman is whiter than [ranch dressing], most likely a wino, and lives in the [cookie-cutter] suburbs but will tell anyone she meets that she lives in INSERT CLOSEST CITY HERE.
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