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Probably [the biggest] idiot you'll meet. A Tom owns multiple cars, none of which work and spends his days adjusting his nuts. Tom is renowned as having a [large package] but never gets any girls because he never tries due to crippling self hatred. Tom was voted least-likely to succeed in high school, and again in college due to his inability to read. Probably will end up directing [porno movies] for a meager living.
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