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Officially, Gritty is the 7 foot furry orange mascot of the [Philadelphia Flyers] (see attached). Gritty’s big googly eyes are are well suited for his search for the perfect set of feet that will quench Gritty’s ever-increasing foot fetish. Unofficially, Gritty, like [Hannah Montana], leads a [double life] in Keswick, the location of Gritty’s very humble abode. Said humble abode coupled with Gritty’s AirPods make Gritty the ideal candidate for Yuppos to hang out with. Famous quotes include but are not in anyway limited to the following: “Niiiiiice” “Classic” “You’ll find me in the libs” “North>South”
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