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The only friend you’ll ever need. She is fiercely loyal, will slash tires with you, will drink till your shoes come off and your tongue turns blue, and will be your eardrum for life. You laugh until you cry with her and will probably throw up with her in the local [Waffle House]. She will most likely give you a [rotisserie chicken] for your birthday, but don’t judge this, you actually really needed a [rotisserie chicken]. She can balayage your hair like there’s no tomorrow and will definitely remind you to get a pedicure. If you have a Bridget you have everything. Don’t let her go without telling her how important she actually is.
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