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While engaging in anal intercourse with your partner, have a [third party] insert a [bicycle pump] into your partner’s anal cavity, being careful to ensure an air-tight environment. It is imperative that the partner’s anal sphincter is contracted throughout this entire process. Proceed to have that [third party] pump partner’s anal cavity full of air while continuing intercourse. Upon reaching completion, cease pumping air into the cavity, quickly remove penis and replace with an adequately sized rubber plug. Proceed to aim partner’s anus at a blank monochromatic canvas, preferably black. Have the partner contract their abdomen rapidly while swiftly removing the plug, and enjoy results as pounds of undiscovered semen, fecal matter, and various other bodily fluids spray out like a shotgun accompanied by a whoopie cushion-like sound.
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