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The peej is a creature that is mostly seen at night and rarely seen [in the day], most peejes can be recognised by their eyes which have the look of a drunken fish, the nose with the resemblence of a covenant ghost from halo, and their exceedingly hairy lower half of body and once the peej has been noticed by a member of the public, his [golden brown] leg hairs stick [up and] he makes a run for the closest bin to seek shelter. The common peej also has a brownish ginger short mane and also share a resemblence of Elton John. The peej also has a very distinguishable mating call which resembles a mix of a wolfs howl and a babys cry. These creatures can be very dangerous, mostly tending to hump [everything] within site and excreting waste into drains and roadside grids, these small and decieving creatures are also notorious for the destruction of indian slums, the rape of all their finest women, and the cold hearted murder of all the oldest born children in high income families, showing why they are [one of the most] ferocious creatures in the United Districts of Anglezarke. To ensure full safety from the evil peej, you must carry a spud gun at all times, due to a large allergy of the peej this will make them spontainiously explode leaving no reminants of himself.

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