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In the 1940's when there was little regulation of [scientific research], Tarkmount Medical Research Facility in Omaha Nebraska performed numerous experiments on their patients. The facility's primary goal was to find a way to extend the life of humans and enhance their natural senses. After many many years of grueling research and discouraging failures, the scientists at Tarkmount discovered 4 new abilities that were yet to be unlocked in humans. The first was the ability to move objects with the mind, but was limited to only an up and down motion. This proved very useful for hands-free [masturbation] or sex where the girl is on top. The second, was the ability to curse at someone by just thinking of the word. One would merely have to look at a victim and think of the curse word and that word would be implanted in the victim's mind where it would gnaw away his/her morale for a period of 10 minutes. This proved very useful at sports games to lower the confidence of the players and allow a certain team to gain a brief advantage, or when "[Little Johnny]" at school is bragging about how many toys he got for Christmas. The third and fourth ability lead to the creation of sidefx, a [legendary] hero who brought pleasure to many.
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