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A free-range cephalopod used by Subgenius acolytes in the pursuit of ultimate Slack through the [expression] of their oozquirt laden glands. Natural emitters of F-Rays, these offspring of Cthulhu are prized by the Overmen and Overwomen all [around the world] for their hedonistic sexual expression. Normals are unindoctrinated to this world and must not be privy to the sensual powers of the Prairie Squid, as it will cause them to be obsessed to the people of a full collapse of their personal and [professional] lives.
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