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A [programming language] despised by many veteran programmers as it allows interns to do 95% of the things they do in half the time and without their pasty complexion, decades of hard graft and countless weekends lost at the Games Workshop. The veterans wear the [forbidden knowledge] of pointer [arithmetic] and varargs as a badge of status and power in much the same way as a fat middle aged shift manager at McDonalds would dangle a large bunch of from a belt clip in the hope of jabbing his pudgy, nicotine stained finger into a confused and vulnerable trainee.
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