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Townies, now that is some blingin' sh*t, yo! Seriously, these bastards shouldn't deserve to live (if you can call the pathetic thing they have a 'life'). Every night I lay awake in bed with a bible in my hand, thinking: 'On what day did the lord create townies, and couldn't he have rested on that day too?' Look in a bus shelter, you may find one, wearing shirts that say 'von dutch' or FCUK or some american city that nobody wants to visit. You can't possibly be a cool townie if you are capable of [understanding] and using the [english language]. They are racist pigs, who hate africans, but imitate them in music. Comparing anyone to townies is [offensive], so i'm very sorry to all mentioned so far. Oh, and i'm not finished yet.
  They listen to generic 'gangsta' 'phat' 'beatz', and are so underground and rebellious that the music they like is [one of the most] commercial and mass produced/marketed musical styles ever. They also like bob marley despite never listening to him or acknowledging his pacifist message, but whenever they get a chance, they cover all school design projects with ganja leaves, making it cool to be slowly killing themselves. They also manage to make anything into a sex reference.

EG: *actual [conversation]*
townie 1: Yo man, she iz wel fit, innit!
(points at ugly female townie with face offensive to anyone with eyes)
townie 2: Yo meen da 1 wit' da Burba...bur.. burbar..red cap?
Townie 1: I'd like to wear 'er capyo no wat i meen?
Townie 1: (looks confused,thinks for a minute) ... Yeah man, innit!

What an intellect, eh?  Seriously, townies are hard people, if they outnumber you 50 to 1, they will consider attacking you until they realise that they'd rather be doing it with their sister/brother. They also prove how 'ard they are by shouting 'ya mum' at you. they kiss their 'bitches' in public, and have no sense of people looking and thinking: 'what a load of *****s', because theyre cool to their 'cru', so obviously their lives will amount to more than a [part time job] at mcdonalds [drive thru]. No, wait...

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