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townies (and tramps) are responsible for keeping the white lightning cider company in buisness. townettes (female townies)were born to breed and are very popular when their arse turns purple signifying that they are in season. A confrontation with a townie will involve them repeatedly saying "c'mon then" while walking quickly (usualy backwards) away from you. one step in their direction will result in them s**tting them selves and making a run for it. Townies will afiliate themselves with the nearest large city and thierfore in my home town of Crewe they are all desperate to be Mancunians and can often be heard using phrases like "sorted" and "mad fo it". look for the one who has'nt quite got the hang of the accent yet, you will piss yourself laughing. townie uniform in Crewe is, baseball cap, puffer jacket, blue tracksuit bottoms with a white stripe and poppers down the side (townie pants)bizarely worn with the legs tucked into thier socks and white adidas classic trainers. they can be found outside shops or on street corners, somtimes huddled around a twatted up B reg vaxhall nova. it would be funny if they were not going to spend the rest of their lives living off our taxes.

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