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One has to sit on a tree branch about 11 1/2 feet high. Any higher is dangerous, and any lower will result in a failure of the deed. Once one pulls their pants down, and is ready for the act one has to proceed to poop. [Immediately], without hesitation, one has to fall off the back end of the branch, backflipping, and in turn landing [on the ground] flat on their back. At which point the poop impacts with one's chest. This form of self-masturbation takes many years of experience and should not be perfomed by an amateur. The branch can be substituted with any form of a bar [up in the air].
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