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Warning: Currently haunted by the famed Big Muddy Monster. Warning: Also populated by dillusional crackheads under the imperssion that they have in fact seen the Big Muddy Monster.

ATTENTION/ATENCION: MOST COMMON KILLER AMONG MURPHYSBORO TEENS IS SMOKING WEED AND TEENAGE PREGNANCY!!

1)Small Shit-Hole in the middle of nowhere. 2)Farm land all around, great for farming and burying dead bodies. 3)Land mines all around from the terrorist attacks that happen very frequently. 4)Only few Arabs in population because most have already done their duty. R.I.P. 5)Wanna be Gangsters with toy guns. 6)Lots of bastards that need their balls cut off. 7)Many girls wanting to cut male's balls off. 8)Few girls saving themselves for marriage. 9)Few girls with proper sandwich making technique. 10)McDonalds is discuting.

11)Multiple high-school garage bands thinking they're hot shit, when not. 12)Multiple Hobos willing to shave your back for a nickle, or dome. 13)Once had a stripper joint named Angels, but is now closed due to the wrinkling of the 80 year old stripper. 14)HOOPSQUAD KILLS!! 15)Football team always loses. 16)Best Resturant is in Neighbor Town, Carbonale. Moe's. 17)Very minumum of tampon brand selection. 18)Smells like souage. 19)Boring. 20)Whores don't have any experience and are insufficient.

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