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A crap eagle is a mythical creature embodied by any person or creature who, at the sight or knowledge of anything pure and good, will swoop into the situation and ruin it for everyone. Crap eagles are generally (though not necessarily) humans, and typically showcase at least one of humanity's flaws, including but not limited to: envy, selfishness, vanity, greed, or sloth. The easiest way to tell if your time has been attacked by a crap eagle is the overwhelming feeling of disappointment that is typically left in the wake of a crap eagle strike.
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