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An annual event in which five or more extremely [offensive] individuals with above [average intelligence] and below average judgement coalesce from different corners of the U.S. to engage in illicit activities. The event is not an official "Fest" until an [individual] or group of individuals has made an attempt to microwave an object larger than a microwave. If this attempt transpires within the first hour of the Flag Fuck Fest, it becomes a Flag Fuck-For-All, and all attendees must destroy the closest kitchen.
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