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The Great Pussy Depression of '09. It all started when a black man was elected president. He promised a change, but it never happened. After that it swept across the nation like the Bubonic plague. Many have felt it, yet only few have admitted it. Reports have came in from all over the country. New Jersey to California, Alabama to North Dakota. For a reason not yet explained by scientist or scientologists, the entering of P into V (or B), has been far and few between for all of mankind. Married, single, looking or lesbian, few females have been surrendering the vagina. The reason? Some so called "experts" blame global warming, for enlarging the oceans, and forcing 'clams' to stay closed in the heart of the sea, rarely revealing the pearl. Others say that women have been becoming more and more slutty each year, and have finally went back to chivilious times, only giving up the pooty poo to a select few men, who have been fortunate enough to crush every piece of ass that the rest of us have been missing out on. Either way, the GPD needs to end soon. Jergins stock alone can't rise high enough to relieve this recession.

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