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someone who does all of the following: 1) pisses himself 2) was a douche last night 3) loves anal penetration 4) is bitter and clingy 5) reads this when i show him 6) lifts up girls' shirts when he dances with them 7) smells like BO 8) gets 0.5 GPA 9) bets someone he can go further with his own sister than they can with theirs 10) has beautifully glazed eyes I'm not gonna lie 11) loses city finals 12) has never won a dodgeball game 13) is still totally sweet
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