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To be the steeziest guy in the entire world. Actually unbelievable. Makes the best burgers in town. Wakes up with at least 20 or more ladies in his bed a morning. Is a fantastic photographer. Never has a clean he-ba-roo (car). Often is found sleeping on a porch without blankets. Most commonly seen with a backwards hat and a certain amount of beard length. Eli also shreds the gnar, gnar, pow. pow. "wha-wha-wha-wha-wha-wha-what?" - Eli "Eli! UNBELIEVABLE! This guy!!!" - some northeastern guy "I wake up every morning and i'm just excited that i'm the tightest guy ever." - Eli
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