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(from stay-at-home mom) A man-child who exhibits the following traits:
-does controlled substances
-never allows more than 900 seconds to pass between tobacco cigarettes (during the sleeping hours, he must get up at least twice during an 8 hour period to burn one)
-bums money off of his friends and never pays them back
-the inability to hold a job for more than 40 hours
-lives with his parents after the age of 30
-gets checks from the government and spends 75 percent or more on cigarettes, lottery, or alcohol
-spends endless hours [instant messaging] women to try to pick them up for romantic purposes
-when having a beverage at home, uses a fresh cup for each drink and never helps with just the dishes that he himself created
-attracts alcoholic friends like a rare earth neodymium magnet, especially one who modified himself (cutter) while [under the influence]
-never puts CDs/DVDs back in their cases...discs last an average of 48 hours before noticeable scratches form
-always [looking for] a handout
-performs deliberate premeditated installation of spyware onto the PC that is loaned to him / uninstalls Firefox in favor of [Internet Explorer]
-leaves cigarette burn lines (yes lines, not holes) in the carpet
-listens only to modern rap narratives and goth-death-metal and must listen to it at 80 dBa at 1 meter
-thinks every risk (like spending $20 on a single scratch ticket) will turn out rosy, no matter how far fetched

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