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a black male, usually between the ages of 16-38, answers mainly to "Red", "Black", "Dread", or any single letter of [the alphabet]. [Qualifications] include: 1) must always have a full voice mail box 2) must always be within 15-25 minutes away from anywhere 3) must own the biggest, loudest, most noticable car,as well as a keen knack for undesired attention from law enforcement 4) !!!VERY IMPORTANT!!! Must be able to live in [another time] dimension at least 45 minutes behind Earth.
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