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(Slang) Street Slang for the official C.O.Q.P.D. (chart of queef production defined) the 1st additon.  This scale includes directions and terms to define, describe, and derail queefage.  Here is a breif example. -                             OFFICIAL QUEEF                              PAPERS                         (answer "yes" or "no")  1)Was there a queef?  2)Could you feel the vibration?  3)Could you hear it?  4)Could someone in the next room over hear it?  5)Did the neighbors hear it?  6)Did police come to your front door asking where the bomb went off?  7)Did bomb squad arrive?  8)Was there major structural damage to your house?  9)Did poison control have to come?  10)Did your parents call, asking you why your house was on the news.  "Yes"'s are 1 point, "no"'s are 0 points 1-2 might have been a queef, did you eat any beans? 3-4 yep, that was a queef, go buy some "queef-b-gone" 5-6 dam, that was a good queef 7-8 holy shit, you got an AK-47 in that pussy? 9-10 Go shoot yourself, that's disgusting  (note: if your girlfriend scored 7 or higher on the official queefage chart, dump her sorry ass, cuz she's got queeftasticular cancer)  yea, that was a long defintion, enjoy

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