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When your beard gets caught in a blender and you scream latin curses at that guy across the street for giving you a look of confusion and Bill Murray makes an appearance on a ride on lawn mower owned by the UN and anyone see that movie Eraserhead? That's pretty messed up, I am currently sitting on a chair and you can never have too many of those. There's a man who comes to fix my shower called something wierd like Raoul but stranger, like if Raoul had an affair with Eraserhead and a guy who smells like a grandpa called Rog something was born and immediately started fixing pipes and yelling at toilets. He charged $80, not too shabby, he did kick at my toilet and call it a fucking bastard, the poor toilet's taken shit all its life and has to put up with that on top of it, it's pretty unfair. I'm really not a fan of Pimp My Ride because they put computers everywhere in a car and it's pretty ridiculous. BLAST THE WATERS CAPTAIN AND SHIPSHAPE, WE'VE GOT A GIGGLER ON OUR HANDS SO YOU'D BETTER START SHAVING NOW. Keanu Reeves has frequent visitor scientologists giving him woodpeckers and personality tests.

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