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A grotesquely legendary gastrointestinal event, triggered by consuming an obscene quantity of Wisconsin dairy—typically a cocktail of deep-fried cheese curds, Velveeta nachos, and lukewarm gas station string cheese. Once internal pressure reaches critical mass, the “cheese cannon” fires from the posterior with such force, velocity, and dairy-rich viscosity that it leaves a trail of molten shame wherever it lands. Known for its violent splatter radius, unholy aroma, and permanent emotional damage to anyone within 15 feet. Often accompanied by a war cry of “Go Pack GO!” and a complete loss of dignity. ⚠️ Not to be attempted without a hazmat suit and a priest on standby.
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