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The matriculated manlet is a silly, little manlet boy who is senselessly enrolled at a college or university. Here the completely delusional and diminutively dwarfed Oompa Loompa wastes his time (when not working shifts at the chocolate factory) by furiously staring at all the tall and happy couples who walk around the campus like the bitter and envious peewee manlet that he is, crying all alone in the girl's bathroom after being asked by campus security if he was there for Take Your Daughter to Work Day and if he had lost his daddy and by being stuffed into backpacks, lockers, trashcans, lunchboxes, drawers, toilets, empty cigarette packs, pencil cases and used condoms like the inherently effeminate and minusculely malformed midget manlet bully magnet that he was always destined to be. When not being examined microscopically while standing on a petri dish by horrified microbiology students, the matriculated manlet is free to indulge in his true passions of girlishly practicing his bumbling cheerdance routine in an effort to become the captain of the local manlet football cheer squad and undergoing a brutal hazing ritual in order to join the only fraternity that would accept him, the Sigma Beta Manlet, by engaging in a fight to the death against fourteen other oiled up, bikini-clad midgets in an electrified bird cage.
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