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Son: "In order to lie.... I had to fail the test." Dad: *pulls off shoe and throws it at son* Son: "Ow! Dad, don't you want this? This way no one will kn-"

Dad: *pulls out glock 19 and starts firing at son* Son: *barely dodges bullets* "Dad, stop!" Dad: "You fail test! You stoobid! You not my son!" *pulls out AK-102* Son: *gets hit in leg* "Ow! Dad, you have to stop!" Dad: *ignores son* *dismembers son with five shells from a Challenger 2* Son: *groans in agony* Dad: *tases what's left of son's body * Son: *attempts to scream in agony, but instead blood comes out of his mouth* Dad: "You not my son! Son no fail test!" *lifts off in a A-10 Warthog armed with the Gauzer machine gun* Son: "Please dad.....please..." Dad: *crashes plane into son, ejecting himself 30 inches from the ground* Son: . Dad: *raids a U.S. Army bunker and steals 10 nukes* Dad: *nukes house with son in it, then nukes the whole country just for good measure* Dad: *evades paparazzi and kills families to live in their houses for 4 decades* Dad: *becomes president, nukes the world then uses mods to terraform Mars* Dad: *rapes your mom 10 times to repopulate the human race* Dad: *eventually dies at age 142, wearing a suit with a red rose in his lapel and sunglasses*

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