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Christian Witzke is the biggest [waste of height] to ever roam the earth, which he takes up half of because of his sheer size. Scientists have concluded that he might have a little zest due to the fact he does not speak to the female species. Christian loves to eat, it is actually his main sport. He also plays soccer and lacrosse as a goalkeeper (he takes up the whole goal). Christian also has bad knees from holding up the weight of his [gargantuan] body. Due to his extreme weight he runs like a snake moving side to side as he runs. Christian is very un [intelligent] scoring a high of 73 on his music test.
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