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A severe form of fungal infection paralyzing the barse and balls of the Russian fighters in Ukraine. Reported to be having a major impact on troops morale with many soldiers sending up the white flag 🏳 rather than suffering prolonged exposure. Background: When Vladimir Putin launched his special operation in Donbass he failed to equip his fighting force with adequate santiary provisions resulting in widespread outbreak of this dangerous inflammation on the privates privates. From a fighting force of over 90,000 men, as of April 15 2022, not one pair of clean underpants 🩲 was available for the brave Russian infantry. Some trenches have reported angry puss filled welts the size of snooker balls and desperate soldiers are now diverting much needed drinking water towards washing their fetid undies for fear of the infection spreading. Although the rash can be treated with calamine lotion and sudacrem, these items are among the first to be looted by the invading force and are rumoured to be trading on the black market for $100 per scoop.
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