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A fundamentalist practitioner of the daily caffeine ritual so dogmatic they refuse to serve, let alone imbibe, any other beverage known to humans. They ONLY drink coffee. They only permit coffee to be served to family and friends. They rip babies out of the arms of mothers nursing infants to pour black (slightly cooled) coffee down the throats of said child asserting the lifelong progression towards dementia being diminished thenceforward.
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