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Cobphilia

The philia to end all philias. 60% more pleasurable than the finest spank, 80% more pleasurable than your finest want and 100% more pleasurable than eating something called a......salad.

Cobphilia is the sexual attraction to cobloaves. It's origins dictate to the mid to late 20th century when the first iteration of cobloaves were created which in itself plays on the centuries old love of bread, cheese and eating calories like the goddamn crazy diamond you are .

The philias comes from the arousal of cheese and freshly baked bread and food stuffs that form a holy trinity of sensation, overloading senses and sending people into what's known as 'cobspace' .

Cobspace can be described as a heavenly state of being where the mind is overridden by serenity and grace brought on by a mix of cheese coma and meat sweats and is often hinted at where the person is laying spread eagles on a couch, eyes staring at the distance and cheese dangling lazily from their mouth as their shirt rides up over their bellies.

While with careful consideration is always applied, extreme cobphilisits will often engage in sexual copulation with cobs to feel a deeper connection with their spirituality and their attachment to cob. While we have no problems with this, Cobfessions must advise that it is not undertaken after cooking as the mix of heat and cheese can cause substantial burns to sensitive areas.

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